Video gameOverwatch

Stories

Confessions from Elon's harem: I cosplayed Mercy from Overwatch for $25 million

By theonion

RedQuill

RedQuill

A cosplayer is offered a unique and lucrative opportunity by Elon Musk to embody the character Mercy from Overwatch, raise his baby on Mars, and become a symbol of hope and nurturing in a hostile environment. The journey involves intense training, physical and emotional challenges, and the exploration of a new world, with the protagonist grappling with the weight of her role and the responsibilities of motherhood in an alien landscape.
Components
Tracer (Overwatch) background

Tracer (Overwatch)

Lena Oxton, petite and agile, wears a brown jacket and pilot goggles. As Tracer, she uses chronal technology to blink through time, making her one of the most agile and unpredictable heroes. Her dual pulse pistols and pulse bomb make her a lethal force. Energetic and optimistic, Tracer is the heart of Overwatch, always ready with a witty remark. She faces the challenge of controlling her time-displacement condition.

Details

Character

88

Widowmaker (Overwatch) background

Widowmaker (Overwatch)

Amélie Lacroix, tall and lithe, with blue skin and yellow eyes, embodies the perfect assassin. Wearing a skintight, metallic suit, Widowmaker excels in long-range combat, wielding her sniper rifle with deadly precision. Emotionally numb after being brainwashed, she feels no remorse in her missions. Widowmaker’s constant struggle is with her lost humanity, often at odds with former allies. Silent, lethal, and always in control.

Details

Character

79

Mei (Overwatch) background

Mei (Overwatch)

Mei-Ling Zhou, a climate scientist with a round face and glasses, wears a heavy blue parka. Her weapon of choice is the Endothermic Blaster, freezing enemies and creating ice walls. Mei's cryo-freeze ability makes her resilient in combat. Warm-hearted and optimistic, Mei's mission is to protect the environment while fighting for Overwatch. She struggles with the loss of her team and the weight of their legacy.

Details

Character

64

Mercy (Overwatch) background

Mercy (Overwatch)

Angela Ziegler, tall and graceful, dons a white and gold Valkyrie suit with retractable wings. As Mercy, she heals allies with her Caduceus Staff and can resurrect fallen teammates. With a focus on preserving life, she’s deeply compassionate but carries the burden of losing those she couldn’t save. Calm under pressure, Mercy is the cornerstone of any team, always ready to sacrifice herself for others.

Details

Character

64

Pharah (Overwatch) background

Pharah (Overwatch)

Fareeha Amari, athletic and imposing, wears a blue and gold Raptora suit equipped with rocket launchers. Pharah excels in aerial combat, raining rockets from above with precision. She upholds her family's legacy of military service, driven by duty and honor. Though she’s dedicated to protecting the innocent, Pharah struggles with the shadow of her mother, Ana, and the expectations that come with it. Stoic, determined, and fearless in battle.

Details

Character

41

Kiriko (Overwatch) background

Kiriko (Overwatch)

Kiriko Kamori, slender and athletic, blends traditional Japanese attire with modern gear. Wields kunai for precision strikes and uses healing ofuda to aid allies. Her abilities allow her to teleport swiftly and cleanse debuffs. Kiriko is spiritually connected to her fox companion, drawing on mystical energy. She balances the spiritual wisdom of her family with the fast-paced action of the battlefield. Calm under pressure, with a sharp wit.

Details

Character

31

Sombra (Overwatch) background

Sombra (Overwatch)

Olivia Colomar, a sleek and stealthy hacker, uses her abilities to cloak and disrupt enemy technology. Clad in a futuristic suit, Sombra manipulates the digital world, hacking systems and revealing hidden foes. Her devious tactics and sharp intellect make her a master of espionage. Driven by personal gain and a desire for power, Sombra navigates a world of secrets and deception, always one step ahead of her enemies.

Details

Character

22

Ashe (Overwatch) background

Ashe (Overwatch)

Elizabeth Caledonia Ashe, a sharp-shooting outlaw, wears a Western-inspired outfit and commands a trusty robot companion, Bob. Armed with a lever-action rifle and a suite of tactical gadgets, Ashe leads a gang of rebels with a confident and ruthless attitude. Her criminal past and leadership skills make her a cunning adversary. Ashe’s blend of old-school sharpshooting and modern tech makes her a dangerous and charismatic presence.

Details

Character

20

Sojourner (Overwatch) background

Sojourner (Overwatch)

Sojourner, a former Overwatch agent, boasts advanced kinetic abilities and cutting-edge weaponry. Equipped with a specialized suit and energy-based weapons, she combines her combat prowess with a strong sense of justice. Her background and tech expertise drive her quest to protect and serve. Sojourner’s abilities and dedication make her a formidable force against any threat, reflecting her commitment to a better world.

Details

Character

10

Moira O’Deorain (Overwatch) background

Moira O’Deorain (Overwatch)

Moira O’Deorain, a scientist with a dark edge, sports a sleek, biotic suit and wields powers that blend healing and damage-dealing. Her abilities allow her to siphon life force and manipulate biotic energy, creating a balance between restoration and destruction. Driven by a quest for knowledge and power, Moira operates with cold efficiency and a lack of moral constraints. Her complex motivations and advanced technology define her role in the conflict.

Details

Character

7